Thank you for Pot, Alcohol, and Power Tools

‘Tis the Season…yada yada… let’s get drunk so we miss it!

I rarely drink alcohol anymore. It has an effect on me that is not conducive to maintaining dignity or enhancing my ability to operate power tools—social or otherwise.

Nor does it do much for my ever dissipating brain cells.

But I do believe everyone has the right to destroy their own brain cells as long as they don’t hurt anybody else.

Killing brain cells is fun.

Killing people while killing brain cells is not so funny.

There are monkeys that eat fermented fruit to obtain the same effect we get with a martini or a Budweisser.

Aristotle talked about drunk monkeys and Darwin mentions them in The Descent of Man.

Monkeys like fun too.

But they don’t drive out of the jungle and run over other animals while they are having fun.

I don’t smoke pot any more either, but if I did, I would inhale.

I believe everyone has the right to inhale what ever they want as long as they don’t exhale on other folks who are trying to operate power tools.

I have noticed that alcohol and marijuana are power tools in and of themselves.

There are people that offer to buy others drinks to establish a position of hospitable power.

There are some folks who drink because they like the illusion of power that it has on their timid personalities.

Then there are folks who just give away their personal power to drinking alcohol.

Yeah, a whole lot o’ power being left in urinals, huh?

Now, pot has a different power trip going on.

It’s a lot more covert and mellow than alcohol.

I have never witnessed someone take a hit off a bong and punch somebody.

I have never seen a group of stoned folks go out and try to execute a take over merger with a corporate CEO holding a martini.

Now if the CEO was holding cookies or nachos that might be different.

Pot just doesn’t create that kind of power.

But it does have the kind of power that makes you believe you have more friends than you actually do if you are the one who has pot at a party.

The power tools of pot are more internal, etheric, and not as public.

Pot is to consciousness enhancement what alcohol is to consciousness alleviation.

Though both of these have the power of giggling and humor, pot just isn’t quite as loud about it.

And as far as power tools go, I still wonder why those in power see fit to legislate and control stoned monkeys but they let drunk monkeys run the world.


image stolen from the internet


~ by leakelley on December 7, 2010.

9 Responses to “Thank you for Pot, Alcohol, and Power Tools”

  1. excellent question.

    I loved the wicked sense of humor throughout this.

  2. I’m afraid drunk monkeys have run the world long enough for folks to actually feel nostalgic about 3 martini lunches. So many deals were made, so many afternoons chalked up to an invisible loss of productivity, so many affairs begun – all under the influence of the *power lunch*. Those power tools are obviously still in play…and they’re killing people.

  3. What a great post, lea! I soooo agree with you.

  4. Bravo to this post!! I so-o-o-o much agree!!!

  5. Awesome ending. I think a nice quiet lunch with some nachos would do some good, or at the very least, make the corporate bad guys forget what it is they were supposed to be taking over in the first place. Instead of 300 jobs lost you’d have a bunch of fat white guys huddled around a cool screen saver for two hours.

  6. Also – pot laws were created as a way to “control” those “pesky Mexicans”. It was ALWAYS called cannabis before, until Reverend Uncle Sam decide that “majijuana” sounded scarier and more “more Mexican” (from GRASS, the documentary).

    How many African-American males are in prison over pot? Too many.

    Sounds like drug laws are part of institutional racism to me.

  7. with all the words of referance,
    i wish to call to mind
    that ‘the enternal smoke
    depression, blindness,cancer,can be made into paper, can be made into clothing
    is the part of stepping stone into
    Astral TRavel.
    and a touch the ja
    God,energy,toa,faith,loyality,devotion,love, tide time is tied straight to tides.
    mass movement through idea.
    plant people rise.

  8. LOL! I so enjoy reading you girl!!

  9. Hahaha, what a brilliant post. Love love love the ending.

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