Thank You for Flexual, Sexual, and Human

We are sensual and sexual beings.

We are beings who’s sexuality can be influenced by genetics, chemistry, environments, and personal experiences.

Our associations and contacts with others, male or female, contribute to gradually developing our experience of ourselves, our bodies, and our perceptions of intimacy, sensuality, and sexuality.

So many factors go into influencing the definition of our selves and developing  the characteristics that connect us or separate us from another human being.

We establish boundaries with one another —those boundaries are sometimes determined by things we cannot control or which we are not consciously aware of in a given moment.

Proscribed sexuality and culturally dictated rules around sexual expression can create all manner of confusion, self negation, and rigid judgment toward others to defend concepts that may not serve or enhance understanding and accepting ourselves or one another as a the sexual beings whom we are.

Today, I am wondering why we still segregate ourselves into categories of sexuality.

Any sexual act that victimizes or exploits another repulses me, and I contend that these acts have more to do with broken people than sexual beings to which I refer .

But healthy sexual beings are created through complex physical, emotional, and psychological influences.

We are all the same in this regard.

Again, we are all the same in this regard.

I can understand why some of my friends have created a lifestyle around their sexuality.

I think anytime a fear induced majority persecutes a perceived minority, the minority must find strength where they can, just to survive—sad as that may be, we have participated as a society in creating this defense mechanism through our own ignorance.

I believe every one of us has the capacity to experience our sexuality with someone of our own gender or otherwise, but our preferences and responses are not always consciously chosen.

Our sexual experience should not be a determinant factor in our roles as members of a collective or society.

Yet, we perpetuate separation, into sexual categories, and continue to behave as though an individual’s sexual preference defines all of who they are, and how we respond to them on so many levels, openly or otherwise.

I am not the only human to notice this, I’m certain.

Marketing companies, consumer research groups, extreme religious groups, and people who are afraid of reflecting on their own sexuality,  benefit much from our adherence to separating humans into categories to compartmentalize, manipulate, dominate, or deny.

Why are we still participating in this?

Why are we so afraid of our own flexuality that we allow ourselves to be put into categories that limit our experiences and undermine such an integral part of our humanness—the physical exploration and innate pleasure and development of our sexual being?

While we seem to be making social progress by passing condescending initiatives and patronizing laws, we have yet to understand that it is not about us and “them”.

It is about all of us that are sexual, flexual, and human beings.

Today I have decided to visualize other humans as androgynous beings with the capacity to love, feel, think, and behave exactly like me.

Today, I will create one less degree of separation between my own body and my own mind.

I give back the boxes and cages to those who have labeled me a heterosexual according to the needs of a church, a society, or a community designed to propagate followers, consumers, or self haters.

Today, I am experiencing my own flexuality as a human being and honoring others who, like me, have been influenced by complex factors into becoming who they are.

Today I am experiencing my natural flexuality and it feels good.



~ by leakelley on July 8, 2010.

6 Responses to “Thank You for Flexual, Sexual, and Human”

  1. if we have learned nothing as a unity of civilization.. we learn we are spirits ,, all else follows suit..

  2. Complex indeed! But I am so glad I finally “found” who I am best sexually!

  3. We have inherited our “categories” and our “boxes and cages” from the rigid logic of Aristotle #smilesandhugs

  4. Need I say, finding one’s direction, belief or focus would help in the search. I have zero use for those that need to categorize life issues, as they are just that. Life has so much to offer in all it’s forms, why should it be so difficult to embrace it, as Paul McCartney said just, “Let it be.”

  5. Bravo!

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