Thank You for Knowing “Linda” sent it
My friends, Linda and Dave, they love me. That’s right.
My friends, Linda and Dave, they think it’s my birthday all the time.
Sometimes, on a random day, I get a Trader Joe’s gift card in the mail from Linda’s cats, Sylvester, Princess, and Audrey, but I know Linda sent it.
Sometimes I get one from somebody I never heard of (like a character out of some novel that hasn’t been written yet) but I know Linda sent it.
Sometimes I get post it stickers, random office supplies, and a coffee gift card wrapped up like a Serbian taco in a paper Babushka.
I know Linda sent it!
One day I met the Fed Ex guy at the door and he said “You’ll never guess who this is from!” as he handed me yet another care package with a brilliant smile.
Oh Yeah, Linda and Dave! Yep!
And ya know what? It had Payday candy bars in it! (my favorite)
Me and the Fed Ex guy, we’re gonna get married because he spends more time at my house than at his own.
One time I got a hand made quilt in a Fed Ex box! (I assumed it was a wedding present for me and the Fed Ex guy)
Sometimes there’s books. Sometimes there’s candy.
Sometimes there’s things to share with others.
One time there was a grocery gift card to “Go buy some Coffee and Half and Half”. It was sent from “Lou” but… I know.
I should probably tell you that Dave works at Fed Ex.
It puts things into perspective.
I once said to Linda “I wish I could find a guy like Dave.”
So… you guessed it… she keeps sending me one!
Yesterday, I got a bigger box than usual. The Fed Ex guy was still friendly about it even though it was heavier than most of the others.
It had super healthy dried pasta made of whole grains and flax (fusilli and penne). It also contained a pound of great coffee, a bag of fancy mixed nuts, and a gift card to my favorite junk food establishment.
I tried to make meaning out of the contents because Linda is a cryptic gal, like me. I’m still trying to decode the contents. So far I figure it has to do with a fu Silly gals going nutty on caffiene in the paradoxical universe of health food dominating chicken nuggets.
Also, Linda is a real trickster, ya know?
So now that I’m onto her, she may start sending you stuff.
If you start getting a random stack of post-its or a can of specialty cat food with a poem that starts out “Oh kitty, Oh Kitty”, or a bag of raisins from someone named “Bunny”…
Just so ya know …Linda sent it.
Linda and Dave: Thank you. I love you.