Thank You for The Mystery of Drunk People

If you are not at all charming and charismatic before you have a cocktail, you can rest assured you are even less so after you’ve had ten of them!

Living in a university town, I am consistently impressed, while walking through my quaint neighborhood of night clubs and taverns, with the inspirational transformation that happens on a Saturday night.

You would be amazed!—beautiful young people, dressed in mating call attire with cologne you can smell from the other side of a lead wall in Siberia, all delightfully frolicking through the neighborhood in transparent seduction to have their charms validated.

It starts out quite innocent. Some of these folks are even shy, with impeccable manners and social skills. (This is observed on their way TO the bar.)

Then…(On the way back FROM the bar) Wham! Something amazing happened, I missed it but I know that what ever went on in that bar was profound!

Maybe there was a hypnotist or a cult leader or some other force that took their minds hostage and stole their social skills while they stared at the bottom of too many empty apple-tini glasses. I can not know. I was not there. I can only see the results as they strut back along the same sidewalk transformed.

Suddenly, every  sweet young man becomes Atilla the Hun with a Socrates affect and every pretty young girl personifies the pheromone combination of Courtney Love and the Unknown Stripper.

All University vocabulary morphs into grunts, giggles, shrieks and guffaws as wobbly high heels clack unevenly down the sidewalk and “Dude” becomes everybody’s first name. (male or female)

I think this phenomenon should be researched (maybe at our local university).

It could be funded by the military as a potential weapon in the war against civilized behavior.

It could be the key to developing an antidote for the chronically humorous or anyone afflicted with the bane of common sense.

It could also aid so many in the alleviation of communication skills.

Please, someone find out what goes on in those bars! It could be useful!

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~ by leakelley on August 24, 2008.

One Response to “Thank You for The Mystery of Drunk People”

  1. Dionysus is an immortal, & in the Greek an ‘orgia’ – an orgy that was part of the Dionysian rites in which even Plato happily took part – is both holy work & the doorway to the most incalculable mysteries, most particularly the mysteries of human adulthood. As you know (I know you do 🙂 it is Dionysus that stands invisible, as Gods must, behind every bar, serving up his magical elixir, in which we either discover one another & our deepest secrets & delights, or we lose ourselves in violence & stupors not only because of the drink, but rather because something is wrong with us or our society, about which our stupor & violence is the message, whose messenger, Dionysus, the happiest & most human of all Gods, seduces us into hearing & perhaps heeding by playing his pipe, singing to us, romping with us & bringing his joy so that we may be ourselves as human & of this Earth as is he.

    What Dionysus understands – which our ancient faiths & false notions about ourselves do not – is that it is pleasure, not mere religion, military service or good citizenship that would make us what we can be if we would but let it. We love one another best with our hair down, our hearts open, our secrets spoken & shared.

    What goes on in those bars, then, is what you saw on the sidewalks outside, a terrible desperation in which, things being as they are here & now, our children’s Earthly humanity is become sufferable only when it is wrecked, denied to the mind & forgotten before tomorrow. Dionysus knows that if this disorder of the human self continues & spreads, even he will die.

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