Thank You for Closure after Twelve Years

When Kaelin was a toddler I took her for a walk in her stroller. 

A gust of wind came up, blowing leaves in a circle in front of us as we stopped at the corner.

Kaelin shrieked with glee and pointed at the dancing leaves.

I said “Leaf, can you say Leaf? That’s a leaf.”

Every time my friend Pablo brought her to my house after that, she giggled and pointed at me and said “Leaf!”

While others called me Lea, Kaelin continued calling me Leaf.

When Kaelin turned 15 she went missing. 

That was over twelve years ago.

I flew back to Ashland Oregon from San Francisco to help look for her and support my friend, Pablo in his distress at the time.

There has been an ongoing investigation to find Kaelin Glazier for all these years since.

There has always been the idea in the back of our heads that maybe we will see her again some day, maybe she will show up with children in tow, maybe she ….

I had not seen her as a teenager so I always remember her as a precious toddler with beautiful blue eyes and soft blonde curls with a magnificent giggle.

Pablo called me the day before yesterday.

“They found Kaelin’s body.”

The report said she was a victim of a violent crime.

The investigation to find her killer continues.

We will not see Kaelin again.

My heart aches for Pablo and Kaelin’s mother, Kim.

They say closure is good.

I don’t know if it is harder living without knowing or if this kind of closure is worse.

But now we will have a memorial ceremony for Kaelin after holding on for all these years on May 1st. (her birthday)

I will go there to say good bye to innocence and a sweet child that never got to become a woman.


Kaelin as a teen and Kaelin’s birthday almost two decades ago in Ashland, Oregon (Kaelin Rose)


~ by leakelley on April 14, 2008.

4 Responses to “Thank You for Closure after Twelve Years”

  1. Oh, Leah, I am so sorry about your friend.
    May her soul rest in eternal peace.

  2. I am again, so devastated. Another word does not describe what I feel for Pablo, Kim, the grandparents, friends, and you, my sweet Lea. We are so tired now. We’ve lost so much, and so many. Your Mikey, my Owen, Karma’s Kevin, Pablo’s Kaelin, and more, that I can’t even recall at this late hour in our lives. I miss them all.

    We hold on. I don’t know why, but we do because we can. Hold on, Letha Jean.

    I love you, LeaKel.

  3. I am so sorry. Love to you Lea.

  4. Lea,

    That is a beautiful tribute.

    Please contact me about Kaelin

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