Thank you for People Who Know Better

than to;


cook cheese on a stick over a campfire


spend three days in the desert with just a twelve pack of Budweisser 


enlist in the Military to get a journalism degree 


go cow tipping (in sandals, at that)


drive a ‘68 volkswagen over steep mountain passes towing a trailer on a rope


tell a rabid coyote to “Sit!”


clean antique furniture with clorox


refrigerate a birthday cake with lit candles


claim American citizenship to get out of jail in a third world country


use crazy glue to repair the sole of a shoe while wearing the shoe


take a car battery on an airplane


chew bubble gum in 120 degree heat


accept a loan from a guy named Vinny


offer a loan to a guy named Squiggy


rely on the news media for information


place a BBQ next to the trampoline at a party 


stop to pray when a careening bus is two feet away


feed a dog peanut butter


buy one of those monster trucks to impress a girl


ask directions to the office in a psychiatrtic ward


get on a crowded elevator after lunch at El Taco Del Frijoles


wake me up in the middle of the night just to ask what I’m thinking about


Please, stop, think, don’t do it! 


Be one of the people who know better.









~ by leakelley on January 26, 2008.

3 Responses to “Thank you for People Who Know Better”

  1. than to
    go for an Akon concert and get molested by him
    have a cobra as a pet
    take grammar lessons from Bush
    Short, light and entertaining like most of your posts! 🙂

  2. than to
    join a gym in January, take up the machines and lockers, and then disappear around February 15th.

  3. I promise never, never, never to wake you up in the middle of the night to ask you what you’re thinking. I’ve seen it. It’s not a pretty sight, and one that could land a person two feet in front of a careening bus, praying or not.

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