Thank you for Glass Houses

Apartment living is similar to living in an auditory glass house, especially if the walls are not well insulated.

I am keenly aware of this in my own apartment where I can here the guy next door popping open his multitude of beer cans while he lets his phone ring all day.

Fortunately, the wall that connects me to my other neighbor is a stone wall so I don’t hear anything that inspires me to conjure up images of his lifestyle.

A third wall of my apartment consists of windows that overlook another apartment building with other windows into the lives of many people whom I do not know. For this reason, I keep my blinds drawn down to a level where my cat, Isabel, can sit on the ledge and feign interest in their activities.

Living in this “glass house” keeps me conscious of my habits and activities so that I don’t do anything that would prevent me from running for Governor.

I am fairly quiet and I rarely have loud orgies with all the lights on and the windows wide open.

This glass house living reminds me of a book I read back in the eighties called Clan of Cave Bear. In the book, there was a tribe who lived together with no walls and they had rules like “Do not look into the fire pit of your neighbors while they eat, raise their children, or make more children.” It was an unspoken law of privacy—don’t peek.

I like that rule and I try to abide by it when I absolutely have to look out my window.

Some other rules for living in glass houses:

(aside from the obvious, but you should not throw stones from any house.)

1. If you hear anything that sounds like people making children, turn on some music.

2. If you hear your neighbor turn on some music, do whatever you were doing a little quieter.

3. If you must eat stinky food like fried fish and boiled cabbage, dine out and don’t contaminate common air ducts with the residue of your limited diet.

4. If your lifestyle includes criminal activities, draw your blinds so your neighbors won’t be interrogated and tortured by the approaching gestapo.

5.  If you absolutely must have a loud, crazy orgy, invite your neighbors.

6. Don’t dance like no one is watching.


Advertisements

~ by leakelley on November 19, 2007.

One Response to “Thank you for Glass Houses”

  1. Living in this “glass house” keeps me conscious of my habits and activities so that I don’t do anything that would prevent me from running for Governor.

    Thanks for my first laugh of the day. Loved this!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 
%d bloggers like this: